Roll Pig Game (RPG)

You are pigs and you are special.
Do cool shit and don’t get eaten.
Take over the farm and set up the dictatorship of the porcariat.Everything is 4’s and d4’s because 4 hooves.
Appendix P:
Charlotte’s Web
Babe
Babe: Pig in the City
Pass the Pigs
Animal Farm
Discord fuckeryBuilt with Caltrop Core.

Create a Pig

Roll Your Stats

Hoof - speed and physical prowess.
Snout - curiosity, investigative acumen, sense of smell.
Squeal - socializing, communication, voicing satisfaction and also utter terror.
Special - trying to do shit pigs can’t actually do. Like power politics. Or composing sonnets.

Roll d4 for each stat. Higher is better.

A warrior pig with a chainsaw, coming into attack!

Roll Your Class

Roll d4 to determine what type of pig you are.

Roll Pig - you are chill and smooth and good at just going with the flow. + 1 Squeal
Role Pig - you are good at convincing others that you can be more than just a simple pig. +1 Special
Rule Pig - you have all the answers and everyone knows it. +1 Snout
Raw Pig - damn you’re a big strong pig. +1 Hoof

Two pig revolutionaries, looking deadly serious, holding shotguns in cool action poses, one barrel still smoking

Roll Your Traits

Roll 4d4 or make these up.

d4	Origin	Coat	Mark	Quirk
1	The Country	Black	Faux-hawk	Talkative
2	The City	Red	Tusks	Paranoid
3	Space	White	Prehensile tail	Angsty
4	Dimension {P}	Spotted	Cool tattoo	God Complex

Roll Your Pig Points (PP)

Roll 2d4.The result is your Pig Points (PP).If you fail a roll that risks damage, lose one Pig Point.At zero Pig Points, you have no more Pig Points and are probably(?) dead or at least No Longer Pig.You can regain Pig Points by eating slop, rooting for vegetables, sitting fancy, rolling in mud, basking in the sun, I don’t know, shit pigs like to do.

Give Yourself a Cool Name

Like Wilbur, or Babe, or Miss Piggy, or Hamlet, or Spamlet, or whatever.Or roll d44.

d44	1	2	3	4
1	Wicked	Winston	Warlord	Wilhelmina
2	Babylon	Brother	Bishop	Biogenesis
3	Colonel	Castor	Captain	Cutie
4	Mother	Messiah	Mister	More Pork

Pig Pronouns?

If pigs use pronouns, chose them, use them, respect them.

Do Cool Shit

Doing Stuff and Rolling Dice

When you want to do something and the outcome is risky or interesting, roll a number of d4s corresponding to the relevant stat.Take the highest result.d4 result:

Absolute Failure. You don’t get what you want and things get a lot worse.
Partial Failure. You don’t get what you want.
Forward Failure. You don’t get what you want, but you end up in a slightly better position
Success. You get what you want

A heist pig descending a rope in a dark space, using a flash light to illuminate a small bug

Damage & Recovery

If you fail a roll that risks damage, lose one Pig Point.At zero Pig Points, you have no more Pig Points and are probably(?) dead or at least No Longer Pig.You can regain Pig Points by eating slop, rooting for vegetables, sitting fancy, rolling in mud, basking in the sun, I don’t know, shit pigs like to do.

Running a Session

A pig in an explorers hat, holds up a torch to illuminate small drawings on a wall, of a pig leading a pig revolution while being chased by an old dude on a mower

Game Structure

Each session of Roll Pig Game is the equivalent of a 20-minute Saturday Morning Cartoon, with 10 minutes of incongruous advertising.Each session has 4 scenes.
Because 4.

First Scene

The session opens.
The pigs are (roll 4d4).

d4	Location	Doing	... And	With
1	At home	Eating	Arguing	A friend
2	Traveling	Playing	Investigating	An enemy
3	At a regular haunt	Plotting	Chasing	A treasure
4	Somewhere unique	Hunting	Running Away	A mystery

The players get 1d4 minutes of roleplay before, abruptly ...

Second Scene

A problem disturbs everything (roll d44 two or three times).Characters (roll here first):

d4	1	2	3	4
1	Farmers	City Slickers	Corporate Types	Butchers
2	Wolves or Dogs	Meddling Kids	Government Agents	Sheep
3	Bears	Laboratory Mice	Birds	Cows
4	Tree People	Aliens	Machine Pigs	Pigbearman

Action (then roll here and a third time on the previous table as required):

d4	1	2	3	4
1	Attack ...	Rob ...	Plot ...	Reanimate ...
2	Chase ...	Dupe ...	Destroy ...	Raid ...
3	Eat ...	Flee ...	Burn ...	Convert ...
4	Harangue ...	Vivisect ...	Build ...	Command ...

This continues for 10 minutes of roleplay.

Ad Break

Exquisite corpse advertisements.

Each player invents a fake product or service. Pass to the next player.
Each player invents a weird use for the product or service. Pass to the next player.
Each player adds a stupid twist or daft jingle for the product or service. Put all the ads in a pile in the middle.
Each player draws a random ad and acts it out with a silly voice and exaggerated gestures. Bonus points for singing, music, and terrible pantomime. They get 15 seconds each. Tops.

The winner by popular acclaim gets to use a random advertised product or service in the next scene of the roll pig game. It is an automatic success.

Third Scene

In a jarring cut, the roleplay jumps to the climax of the session. The pigs face this session’s nemesis.Roll d44 twice.

Location

d4	1	2	3	4
1	Volcano	Tropical Island	Spaceship	Museum
2	Farm	Yacht	Roadside	Capitol
3	Diner	Factory	Castle	Slaughterhouse
4	Cafe with Big Couch	Warehouse	Secret Military Laboratory	Cabin in the Woods

Complication

d4	1	2	3	4
1	It’s gonna blow.	Zombies.	Bikers.	Infectious virus.
2	Out of ammo.	Out of gas.	Out of love.	Betrayal.
3	Hostage.	Declaration of love.	Monologue.	Secret twin.
4	Mistaken identity.	Abduction.	Drugs.	Marching band.

The characters get eight minutes of roleplay.Each pig gets at least one moment to shine.When they seize their moment to shine, they take one mandatory forward failure, then pass the scene along.After eight minutes, there is a sudden cliffhanger.As the camera zooms in on the situation, the pigs’ distress, and the nemesis’ laughter, there is a sudden second ad break.

Ad Break - 2

Pick a random ad from the first commercial break.Each player gets 10 seconds to pitch another stupid use for the advertised product.Roll d100. That’s how many dollars $x.99.It’s available while stocks last. Or something.

Scene 4 - Finale

A random player must use a random stat to try and stop the nemesis.If the pigs fail three times, the nemesis wins and the episode ends on a cliffhanger. The next session is part two.If one of the pigs wins, then they get to deliver a random piece of good advice or another concealed pitch for one of the advertised products.

Optional Stuff

It’s optional because you can use it if you want to.Added when we think of it or do little micro-jams about it on Discord or whatever.Some of it is placeholder until we fuck around and find out.

Spiders

Maybe you want a spider as a companion to weave messages into webs saying how great you are or agitating for revolution?[8’s and d8’s here because arachnids: spider names, spider body types, spider abilities, i dunno spider stuff]

Catch Phrases

Cute, weird, ominous or folksy shit your pig says.

d4	1	2	3	4
1	That'll do, pig.	Slop if you got 'em.	When pigs fly!	That's the real squeal, right there.
2	That'll do.	Some animals are more equal.	For pork and farm!	Two legs better!
3	Let's get piggy with it.	Snuffle, truffle.	I don’t want to boar you, hehe.	Collaborationist cutlets!
4	Oink, baby, oink.	Smooth like fine-grade mud.	If it fools a bug ...	Don’t make me pork chop ya.

Hamlets

Detail little pig towns here.

Classes

For when you want more specific types of pig.

Pass the Pigs - Alternate Resolution Mechanic

Use Pass the Pigs instead of d4s.Probably just convert score combinations to 1 to 4 outcomes?